


The Boy who Died

by books4belle



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Adoptive Parents - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Boy-Who-Lived Neville Longbottom, Character Death, Gen, Memorials, Minor Original Character(s), Stillbirth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2017-07-16
Packaged: 2018-12-03 00:05:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11520357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/books4belle/pseuds/books4belle
Summary: Lily, James, Remus and Sirius gather to remember HarrySad fic with very personal meaning for me.





	The Boy who Died

No one is sure who set the first light, but the tradition was already decades old by the time James first noticed one. He asked his parents about what they meant just before he boarded the train for his second year. They seemed reluctant to talk about it. James understood why. It’s not really something that was discussed, especially back then. 

He always watched for them after that. Sometimes there weren’t any, sometimes just one. He remembered that year in the Order when he counted a heartbreaking four lights drifting through the air as he and Frank Longbottom took their shift watching over the platform. 

In the afternoon, James drops Charlotte and Lucy off with Mrs. Figg, who is always happy to watch the girls, and heads downtown to meet Lily. He stops to pick up a cup of her favorite tea, and is rewarded with a kiss when he arrives outside the Ministry. They apparate together to a spot a few blocks from the train station. They both need a bit of a walk. Hand in hand, they travel in comfortable silence. Lily finishes her tea and discards the cup in the bin outside the station. 

Remus and Sirius arrive, late and a little frazzled. David is, Sirius reports, finally equipped to start his third year after a long day of shopping in Diagon Alley. There was only one minor row in Quality Quidditch Supplies when Sirius was ready to give in to David’s request for a new broom, while Remus stuck to their original agreement: They were trying to teach their son to be responsible by having him save up his own money. 

Parenting is coming more naturally to the pair after 4 years of practice, but it was never easy. James could sympathize. After 8 years with Charlotte and 5 with Lucy, he still doesn’t have it right all the time. But David is a great kid. According to Sirius, he’s especially excited to start Ancient Runes this year, since it was his birth father’s favorite subject. He’d been talking Nyall and Hope’s ears off about the subject when Remus and Sirius left them all at Flortescue’s. 

The four of them make their way through the station. Rush hour will begin soon, but for the moment, it’s relatively quiet. They arrive at the barrier with little trouble and step through onto the deserted platform. 

James’s brave face starts to slip a little as the gravity of the moment settles in around them. They form a loose semi-circle, facing the empty track. Sirius spins the tips on his prosthetic fingers, a nervous habit he’s had since he lost half his hand apprehending Peter all those years ago. 

Eleven years ago, James thinks sadly, preparing his wand. He stands next to Lily, who takes a deep and calming breath and begins to speak: 

“My sweet boy. I can’t believe it’s been 11 years. Mommy and Daddy love you and we miss you every single day.” Lily squeezes his hand and James smiles gently down at her.  
“But we especially miss you today. We think about who you might have been. What you would be doing. What mischief you’d be up to.” They all chuckle at that.  
“I wonder what house you’d be in.”  
“Gryffindor,” Sirius fake-coughs. Remus elbows him.  
“Regardless of which house,” Lily continues with a pointed look, “We would have been proud of you. I wonder what classes you’d like best. I still wonder what color your eyes would have been.” Lily’s voice breaks, too emotional to continue.  
James wraps his arms around his wife, holding her close. He clears his throat, clogged with emotion, and speaks:  
“Harry, mate. We set this light for your first day at Hogwarts. We miss you. We love you. You’ll always be in our hearts.” 

He holds his wand out and says “ _Amormentum_.” A sphere of warm, blueish light alights from the tip and drifts gently to hover in the air a few feet above their heads. 

All of them silently watch the light for a while. James finds himself feeling calmer and steadier as he watches. He knows it’s just a symbol, but it feels somehow like a little piece of Harry is there with them in that moment. Over the years, the grief of losing their son to stillbirth has lessened, but the hole in James’s heart will never completely heal. It hurts like hell, but having this small way to honor Harry helps. 

Sirius breaks the stillness, coming over to wrap James and Lily in a hug. “Well done, mate,” he says gruffly as he pulls away, and it’s all James can do to keep his unshed tears from spilling over.

Remus has tears in his eyes too. “A fitting tribute,” he says nodding while he receives Lily’s fierce hug. His voice cracks a little as he continues, “We’ll be sure to point it out to David tomorrow.” 

And they do.  
In the hustle and push of the busy September morning,  
Over the heads of students and trunks and owls,  
Over Draco, Hermione, and all the Weasleys,  
Over the round little boy with a scar on his forehead, his overbearing Gran in tow,  
a small blue light of remembrance drifts. 

A light for Harry Potter: the boy who died.

**Author's Note:**

> Seven years ago, my daughter Maura was stillborn and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of her. I woke up this morning with the bones of this story in my head and I couldn't stop until I had written it.  
> I have no idea if it's any good or if anyone will read it, but here it is. 
> 
> Gentle comments only please.


End file.
